Internet was now recovered after about a week of dysfunction. And writing this, feels like I am a paralysed athlete who’s learning to back in track again. Typed-and-backspace-ing kind of syndrome ugh you know what I mean. Frankly, I am thinking to put my pen off. Should I? Maybe I should retired from writing stories, forgetting about the dreams of having a rack of my own books, and just do what peoples do. I am wondering, what makes people keep on going? What did they do for living? I know it is passion and the volcanic enthusiasms that drive them up, but I don’t know what I’m doing here. I’m not really sure if I’m living – at some points. I am not down – being sad, grieving or anything – it is just.. I don’t know. There’s a lot of things going inside my mind. So much things that messed up with my sleep. Well, it was few weeks and days ago, now the disorder is gone (after some self-therapy haha). Apart of all the wonderings, I’m happy with my very own life. My own life – that’s mean, I am emotionally and spiritually stable. I, somehow being so much positive than ever before. Seriously, if I could rate it; from 1 to 10 – the positivity level of mine would be around 8-9! Hah.
It goes like this. Since I reduced my time on social media thingy, I read a lot. For real, I read a lot. Rolled back all the pages and websites that I subscribed, all the bookmarks on the windows tab, and the group of untouched books that happened to be dusty on the shelf, I read them all day by day. They’re all such a positive vibe! And I become more positive as day passes. Now I remembered a couple of saying. “You are what you read” and “You are what you eat” – they seemed to make sense now.
More to pour down actually, but let’s continue in another new entry post.