So maybe this is the plan for our small family. My sister will start her life at Selangor since she will be posting as a teacher soon. The little sister in these two to three months will depart somewhere after SPM’s result was announced. After all, it will be just me staying home with mom and dad, after quite five years I’m apart from home. Well, that would be a little awkward but anyway, it’s good. I can look after them and spend time at home as much as I want. I don’t need to pack my luggage for this time being, thinking what should I bring along – – life should be much easier after this, perhaps.
Thinking back for every journey we had, I realised that we’ve grown up so much. I still remember our childhood times, especially when I pushed my sister toward the mirrored cupboard when we were playing police-entry game. haha. She fell with all those mirror pieces, left with a remain scar at her hand. see? how I was ‘absorbed’ into such game. haha. We’ve never serious about fighting, we can strictly correct others’ mistakes (which means a short war) but at the end of the day, no one hurts for too long.
Now that everyone has our own path, may Allah enlight and bless our track. All the best for everyone, I know, phase after this would be life maturity and seek for the true meaning of living.
It was a strange day when I first saw the vacancy notice outside of the company. I thought hey, this could be mine. I love this job, sounds nice! I want this. Who cares kalau not in my degree background. Rezeki ada kat mana-mana kan?
I was in hesitation for about two days. Thinking about the probability of being accepted. And there was one major thing wandered through my mind – “Do they hired the not-too-fit people?” since it is about wellness. heh
Gaining all the crazy courage, I gave my name and he said the manager will contact me in person for an interview session. Okay. Great (read : Hate). Another interview.
Days passed with no news. I’m not hoping much to be honest. It was a fun-and-random trial attempt. In fact, I started to believe that it wouldn’t lead to anything.
Not until yesterday when I got a phone call from a young, Chinese lady.
Interview session! Could you believe it? And that was when everything happened for me in these recent days started to make sense. I’m stunned thinking how great Allah is. After rain, HE gave me a beautiful rainbow. See? Just, don’t lost hope. I’m not wrong when thinking there must be something better await for me. Grieve not, pray harder.
Oh ya, make it short – I was accepted to be a trainee wellness advisor. Alhamdulillah. It is a dream come true. You won’t understand how passionate I’m in being a wellness coach/advisor. Feel like zaman kegemilangan dulu masa buat Herbalife. I love this kind of activity! Spreading and sharing wellness information for a better life of mankind.
I’m pretty sure this 2015 onwards, I will attend most of my friends’ wedding and engagement. Today was my best best buddy’s wedding. She used to sit beside me back then in my sekolah rendah. We got through so many things together, used to wonder who will settle down first – and obviously she won!
Happy for you, Fatin! ♡
Tomorrow is Diyana’s e-day. She is my best friend since I was in Form 4. And February got another wedding invitation from my matriculation’s classmate. Wait, is this really happening? Haha. Scary how time passes.
I don’t want to be the last person on earth getting married!haha
Finally, Eric contacted me. He is a kind, very soft spoken guy who assisted me through all the interview session two weeks ago. It was my first time experiencing a professional interview..
and it was a failure. I failed.
Disappointed? Uhm, a little bit – because I thought it was easy. It was unexpected that they focused on the scientific names and microbiology kind of thing. Almost everything were answered confidently with the art of lies, suggesting, and hoping they could be somehow true. haha. Serve you right, Izni. You should not skip Microb’s class too often back then in your degree study. But seriously, I hate Microbiology.
I was confused with this damned puzzle. Seemed like its not going anywhere – and despite of all those shitty feelings, I was finally managed to be positive. I have to stay positive, come rain or shine. Positive thing always comes from positive thinking, isn’t?
On the another hand, it is good that I failed the interview. I heard the job tasks are quite tough and if I was accepted, I will have to do manly chores. Working under the hot sun, handling some heavy equipments and of course doing Microb’s thing which I have to re-review all the topics and procedures that I’d ‘missed’ during the class. God loves me, HE won’t let me suffer :]
I grew more positive today. Weird that positivity comes after receiving the negative result,huh? I know this is all Allah’s plans. As HE knows the best while I (we are) DON’T, I believe the best is yet to come.
Activate Plan B, try and pray harder. I must stay strong and be positive. Believe in the law of attraction.
Till then. It was too late, I seldom stay up late at night after my study years. May tomorrow be better than today. Alhamdulillah for everything.
It would be Nutrition if I was meant to pursue my study. I couldn’t think of anything better than that. Thinking of how exciting it would be, I couldn’t stop smiling. haha. I was thinking about Psychology as well, a field that I deadly interested in. You know, like studying people, their life development, complex minds, reveal the unrevealed secret of our fantastic brain, human microexpression, art of decision-making, choices, thoughts, risks, and everything about human being – it’s fascinating! Maybe I should take it as my PhD subject later on? Let’s see.
Travelling this path, sometimes I found it dark and fearful, there were days that I woke up in the morning trying to write at least something, but ended up blank. There were days that I keep thinking what I should do with this life, from where should I start, and the days ended, the nights came and I fell asleep. Life was very much like a carpenter who lost his saws and woods. No nothing. But I know, as long as I have a little courage, I can find the road I need to travel. May the courage stay; keeping the darkness and fears away.
It is hard living like this, but sometimes I love how bright-less my life is. I enjoyed every single moment, I love the facts that I could do whatever I want in a day – but sure, life shouldn’t be lived like this, huh? Gotta move to some points and levels. For now, let things be. I will follow the flow (any flow possible) for this time being and try to live to the fullest.
I was and am lost. who cares? neither do I, sometimes.
But the courage – once I have it, I will hold – – squeeze it to the top.
Coldplay said it well :
Just because I’m losing Doesn’t mean I’m lost Doesn’t mean I’ll stop Doesn’t mean I’m across
A basic pancake is usually consists of flour and egg with broad option to add up banana, lemon zest, cinnamon, paprika, potatoes, and even veggies. I had tried oatmeal pancake a few times ago, but this time, it is flour-less! I never knew that pancake could exist without flour.
They are yummieh! Now, who needs flour to make a pancake when you have oatmeal? 😛
here is the recipe :
egg + oatmeal + ground cinnamon + baking powder + water [amount is customisable according to your portion], and cook it on a non-stick pan.
Thanks WordPress for the reminder. I barely remember the exact born-date of this little buddy! So today is her anniversary, it has been two years already! Yosh!
Two years ago – on this date, it was my semester break. I touched down my homeland and was home alone in the next morning (working-day for everyone), starred on my laptop screen, thinking of something that I’ve been secretly wished for. Own a blog! Writing! Day-to-day self-expression, pouring thoughts! and just with that, it was (finally) born 😀
Writing on WordPress is totally unplanned at the very first time. I couldn’t remember why I chose WordPress instead of Blogspot, Blog, Webs, etc. All I remember is just signed up for an account, and bragged it to Denah.Haha. And she suddenly wanna owned one too (she signed up, but seldom update anything. Denah, I’m waiting for your blog entry 😛 )
.. and the rest is history.
Happy anniversary my little loyal buddy! Let’s make the world a better place to live :]
p/s : this is the 563rd post!
Writing, I think, is not apart from living. Writing is a kind of double living. The writer experiences everything twice. Once in reality and once in that mirror which waits always before or behind.
It was a great mini reunion for us. I seldom love reunion, but this time, it’s different. It is Fiqah and Denah, my favourite kids! haha. I can see their excited faces too, I think we’ve missed each other so much, no? 😛 Nisah has started her instant shawl business and asked for my help to photoshoot her as model. haha it’s funny how I suddenly became a photographer that asked her to do this and that, this angle, those lighting etc. I was just trying my best. Good for her to start the business. She even gave me a baby tomato tree (which I’m not sure how to take a good care of it haha). Thanks anyway, it would be my first time handling plant.
When mom knew they pursue their master studies, she keep asking me to do the same. I know it is easy for me to do master degree at the place, all I need to do is just contact with a particular supervisor and if it’s accepted, then that’s it. I know it is easy but the thing is..I don’t feel like to do master for now.
or should I? I don’t know what I want now. Seemed like I don’t want anything. Is this a waste of time? I mean, this period – of uncertainty is it a waste of time? Am I a plain fool?
urgh. I wonder why I grew up this fast. I wanna be a kid, who doesn’t have any idea about this confusing world except her playground, and sleep time.
anyway, thanks for the chocolate and cheese cakes! (sumpah sedap). Thanks for the tomato tree (let see how long its life span :D) thanks for the great times :]
Perhaps it is not too late to own a planner for this whole year. I meditated in front of my note book and was about to create my own handmade planner, thinking of how could I do that (hopeless creative me) – and out of sudden, my sister said “You can get it online though! You can get everything online nowadays.” And I was like, really? Even the annual planner?!
And I started to search for it online, be it whatever themes and sizes you want – yes there are thousands of that. After a series of extreme rambang mata , finally, I decided to choose a free (don’t you love free stuffs!) and cute planner from this blog. Since it is printable, so I printed all the months’ sheet and glued them in my note book. You can always style it with your own creativity like putting each of the month inside a clear transparent file,binding them together with a ring etc. Since I am not really used to write the planner thingy, so maybe this is the time for me to write a detail plan of the day and be more systematic, and productive too!
p/s : check out Pinterest too. They got a lot (I mean a lot!) of creative, unique and beautiful free planner. Happy planning!