January 2016 has been good

I passed PTD (Pegawai Tadbir Diplomatik) online test with one go.

Yes, it is more to a dream I would say because the questions are damn hard. It was like you were asked to survive in a hot, empty and sandy desert while all what you used to before is trying to live at the ocean. I mean, it’s a whole different things. Am I exaggerating? Nope, at least it works like that in my case. It is difficult -yes – no doubt, but doable. Surprisingly.

As a jobless graduate that didn’t seem to have a bright future , when I got an email saying I was among a few hundred thousands candidates that were offered to sit for PTD exam on 19 January, my parents are the happiest person. Like seriously, they are so excited and planting quite a hill of hopes on me. After quite a series of darkness I’ve encountered, it is like a bright spotlight that suddenly light up right on my face. Never has in my mind to be one. But since my parents are so interested, I decided to give it a try. The hardest try that I’ve ever imagined.

Below tips might be useful for those who wanna sit for SPA’s exam. So, there’s no harm to share right? 🙂

Firstly, I set my mind that I can do it. No matter how hard it is, there’s success story. So, it’s not possible.

Although I hate reading the newspaper or anything involving news, nation and politic (how bad I am?haha) I forced myself to read them everyday. I started to read a lot. News, nation facts and histories, government’s and NGO’s agencies and their role key and not to forget all the policies involved. I bought not-so-expensive ebook about PTD’s note which is not too useful. The questions are wayyyy different from the notes but never mind. At least I can picture the question form. And read and read for three weeks until the exam’s date.

I hate the process but I just want to test how far I can go with that kind of effort. I sat in front of my laptop doing the reading from morning until  evening, and rope skipping before sunset. That was my routine for about three weeks. Haha.

And the day came.

Just try your best answering the questions. Time is no joke. They passed like an arrow. There’s not much time for you to google everything up or revise from your notes. If you have to google it, do it very quickly. Very quick means like a speed of light. No time for loading and reading a bunch of paragraph. In the general knowledge section, I left blank about 3 questions. My laptop hanged about few minutes. I thought I would never pass it.

Then the section continued. This time, it is IQ test and Math. I didn’t study much. I just did a quick revision on a few formulas like statistic, surface area and other basic thing because I know the question format. This is the core thing, you have to know what is the scope of the questions. However, I left about 3 questions owing to my laptop condition. Ok. Fine. Again,after quite a lot of questions I didn’t able to answer, I thought that was it. Who’s gonna make you pass if you didn’t even answer the whole question? Haha. Test over and the happiest person is me because the next morning I swear I don’t wanna read even a single news. I feel like vomiting. Ok. Exaggerating.

A week after, as I opened up my email, my jaw dropped.


Never expected this, frankly. And wait, do I need to start again my news-and-reading routine?

Above all, my parents are the happiest person on earth when they knew the news. Whatever comes after this, at least I know I made them happy once.

So, hypothesis is accepted. Im not a useless person. A few days before my online test, I manage to get a job. A lot of good things happened at the beginning of this year or I’m just lucky. Whatever it is, Alhamdulillah.

Job Offer !!

I started to feel how beautiful it is when you are patience enough to wait for the right thing to occur at a right time.

When the thing you claimed as ‘the right one’ occurred at the wrong time – the fact is; it is not the right thing. Same goes when the not-so-right thing occurred at the right time – basically it’s a protection for you from the wrong thing at that moment. Maybe the thing that you’ve craved badly didn’t seem to happen at the very moment when you need it because God has another plan, which is far more beautiful than you’ve ever imagined.

By saying that, I am so grateful that finally, HE shows me the right path, perhaps what I claimed as the right thing at the right moment. The timing is just right, and I didn’t lament the what-so-ever plan that didn’t work out for me earlier. They must hold a vivid reason, and now I knew what was the reason is. It leads me to another door, which perhaps (definitely!) would suit me better.

Words aside, I got the job!

The position is way more promising than the job interviews I’ve ever had before, Alhamdulillah. Actually I have that confidence that this thing is gonna work, you know the feeling when you feel that you’ll nail it? I can say, it is all come down to the preparation before the job interview – but above all, it’s HIS perfect plan, indeed HE listened, and answered my prayers. I know HE will always do. Alhamdulillah.

In less than two weeks, I will be resided somewhere at Petaling Jaya. Hope that everything will be just fine for me. It’s gonna be a new life chapter and dear self, be ready. You are going to evolve, fit in and definitely you will grow in maturity.

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Already fell in love with the building and its environment the moment I stepped in. Secretly wished that it would be too good to be truth if I’m accepted to be working in this kind of circle. Little that I know, the truth now is too good that I can’t even stop smiling. lol
so true.

last battle

Tomorrow would be my very first job interview in 2016. If there’s a time that I should stop attending interview – and land on a job, this is the exact time. I just hope this time I will nail it. I’m hoping this is my last job interview. Like seriously.

Frankly, it is quite tiring to be a hardcore job hunter. Part of you keep pushing you to the limit, while another part of you just want to have a long sleep, as if sleeping will hush away all those uncertainties in your life – unfortunately, it won’t. You will wake up from the long sleep, end up staring to the blank, white ceiling – trying to figure out how to live again for another day.

If I got any choices, I wouldn’t be so busy hunting for a job. Rather, I will marry someone decent, staying at home – taking care of our cute kiddos, cook for the family and running some personal businesses.

Dreams aside, I hope I can deliver the best for tomorrow’s interview. I must be the best among the best that I’ve ever been before. I wanna fight as if it is my last battle on earth. Perhaps after I get the job, I would meet that decent someone, and all my dreams would finally come true.

Please God, I really want this job.

Great thing takes time. Stay on.

2016 for me, should be a defining year.

I will not miss out something that I did without my full concern and effort, I will not cling on to the past, I will let go what had hurt me in 2015. I will no longer scratch myself out by keep hoping on some shits that I used to before. I will have to learn accepting the fact that something might not turn out like I’m expecting – and no rebel – – just move on. I will not hang into someone that long gone with the thought, maybe, just maybe this time it works. I would have to stop myself from being too pathetic and make this 2016 as a year of self-pride, focusing into certain tangible things, not on my delusional fantasy. I will not waste any second without trying to improve myself out, from personality, health, experiences, languages, skills, and most importantly my soul and spiritual aspects. 2016 – Perhaps would not make my life topsy-turvy. Something has to be in a right order, and that is what I’m grappling with now.

I believe in TIME. Great thing takes time, it doesn’t just happen like bam! It needs preparation, patience, enthusiasm, focus and direction. Don’t know where it will take me, but I brace myself so that I’m prepared for what’s coming in my way.

While my death is imminent, preparing for the Grand Meeting is something that I ought to work on, too.

Happy 23rd birthday to me. A week late. Haha.

*love yourself because if you don’t, nobody will, Cheers.