Not upset

Hot day outside, and it gets hotter inside my apartment due to the unnecessary & immature cold war between le housemates. The best part of it is that, I am involved too.

My closest housemate stopped talking to me, avoided eye contact whenever we met and I am at a lost for words. I am at the stage of not wanting to mend what’s broken anymore. Not that I’d never tried, but you know..

So, I gotta let things be because hey, no one got so much time for such stuffs. I don’t really mind actually because to be honest, I had never get too attached with friends.

So, feel free to detach from me, friend.

Morning rain & memories

I love the rain. I love the smell of the wet streets. I love the sound of the raindrops hitting the roof. I love the moisture in the air. I love the grayness of the sky. Some people might say that the definition of a bad weather is rainy weather, but I don’t think so. I think it’s so beautiful when it rains. You see a different side of people. You see a different side of the world. 

..especially morning rain.

 

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Blogs

Actually, I have 4 blogs. Yeah, you read it right. Freaking 4!

One is this default blog. One is under anonymous account (but still for public) for some personal reason. 

One is a Blogspot, totally owned by me, writing stuffs mainly about my part time job. The 4th blog is actually a local publisher’s blog, I am just one of the writers. 

But guess what? I often run out of time to keep blogging. But anyway I’ll try to keep them alive again. 

The thing is, where does the time go? 

Keep going

Hot shower what makes me going everyday. I mean, reason to wake up, first thing first – hot shower (no longer checking my phone lol) and tornado in the kitchen started for the sake of a decent breakfast and lunch. Such a critical 30 minutes of my life,either I make it, or break it!

I actually declared this month as a non or less-spending month for some reasons. So come rain or shine, I have to slot in cooking in my daily schedule.

I got my self busy since 3 days ago, I work until I barely breath. 8 – 5, and 6 – 11 daily. I promise to work hard and forget about whatever nonsense things in the world. I need to really come to my sense. I have other things to do, too.

I am so tired but I’ll keep this one going.

Everything else is just noise.

Letter to Fizah

Dear Confused Fizah,

From what I heard and saw, I know how difficult it is for you to face this sad reality. That’s the sad truth about life my dear friend- people come and go no matter how hard you want them to stay. When A left our rent apartment, I knew exactly how empty you felt as you were very close to her and hence, you turned to me, started to be my best buddy. Juggling between my job and another job, I knew lately, we were not as close as we used to, plus with a bunch of my new roommates who were also started to get close to me – I started to feel bad if you’ve ever felt left out. In fact, you were already feeling that as you told me that night when I returned home late & tired, hanging out at our usual couch.

You told me that you are missing A so bad, and that you are not too compatible with my new roommates. Also, with your current work pressure – you are afraid of facing the work load since your manager soon will resign; you are not confident to step further in your career due to your health condition. You also mentioned how bad it is to be at 26, but going nowhere in your life. I can see the sadness and insecurity at the edge of your eyes. It’s dark like an abandoned tunnel.

I lost count on how many times I said that it’s okay for us to be where we are now.  Everyone has their own pace, and growing up is not determined solely by how much our salary is, or what kind of position we hold in the company. The level of life is not that narrow. Instead, take the challenges as a way to grow up and gain new experience and knowledge. I know it is hard, sometimes to be positive when everything seemed to be wrong and plain. But trust me, just chin up and walk through all the storms. You will be surprise on how capable you are, and that you are actually, not that bad. Be confident in facing whatever life has brought to you. Get a grip on yourself.

People come and go. That’s what happened in my room, to say the least. In a year, my roommates keep changing at least 2 times.  I’ve lost my best mate, Salina before. I was so close with her and we shared the same thought and mind, but when she said she needed to move out for good, I didn’t feel lost and accept that maybe it is good for her to move out. It’s her life after all. Growing up, I learn to detach because apparently, people and things are impermanent. We can’t let our fate of happiness determined by the existence of something or someone. Happiness needs to be found within ourselves. It is more than that you know. I am not all positive and perfect myself, but I am learning to fathom the art of living, and I think you should too. Perhaps what you can do now is to step out from your insecurity zone, believe in yourself and just walk on the flaring fire.

Feeling empty when A left? – It’s her life. You got yours too.

Not compatible with the new comers? – Try to adapt, otherwise you can always live by yourself. No one is forcing you to be best friend with them. Just a simple hi and bye will do, I guess?

Work load? – See it as a chance to shine!

As the saying goes..

And once the storm is over you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.

Hope you will be just fine 🙂

Sincerely,

Still your best friend.

Jeti Semeling, Sungai Petani

I couldn’t keep track when was exactly the last time we, families enjoyed sunset together. Chilling out while watching how beautiful the sun setting down at this Semeling Jetty..it was indescribable feeling. The colour of the horizon, the reflection of the sun on the water, the breeze..I swear it is an astounding scene.

Such a good place to escape from the bustling city, and keep up with the loved ones. Such a relaxing escape.

Baby, lemme bring you there so that it would be only you and me – and the stunningly yellow horizon.

We watching how the sun swallows the sky..what’s more to ask?

Okay so here are the unedited images. Really, unedited. Enjoy!

xoxo

People are just as lovely
as sunsets,

You just have to be watching
at all the right times.

-Sunsets Within Us-

Hi there, August!

August! I hate to say this but really, time flies. August, 2 years ago I was in the midst of pursuing my Master Degree, not knowing how incompatible I am in the higher education system. I mean, system, procedures, and most importantly scientific research – totally isn’t in me. Needless to say, I went against the flow; I quit. Sorry not sorry Mom!

Being a Master or pHD holder doesn’t determine one’s success or failure. Well, of course they determine something on your achievement but overall, in life I personally think that attitude and mentality are what matter most. Everyone has their own view on life, we have different talent, goal and personality..erm wait why I bother explaining this thing. Lemme stop here before my essay gene shows up.

But anyway, I’ve been waiting for August since 2017 kicked in. We will be travelling to Yogyakarta, Indonesia for the first time! InsyaAllah. It is one of the places I really wanna experience. That means..it would be my 2nd time in the Land of Tempe, after Padang last year. I’m looking forward to visit other beautiful parts of Indonesia (and of course other astonishing parts around the globe too!).  Slowly but surely.

Stepping into August, so many things are left unachieved. On top of the list, it has always been ‘saving’. Hope to be wiser in financial planning. Also me: It’s pay day, let’s eyeing on the beautiful cardigans and shoes, and also eat whatever you’ve craved for since the entire time! – always the ‘other me’.

Happy August. Let’s do better.

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Mess

After I snapped some mesmerizing pictures of golden sunrise with a good half of Air Asia’s flight wing in it after I touched down my homeland, my phone fell down pretty bad, and I reached home just to realised that I lost my SD Card!

Dayyymmm.

With that, I’ve lost all the pictures, and some important apps like MyDays, Wunderlist, and WordPress. I don’t care about others, but man, Wunderlist! I stored all the important passwords (I’m helpless in remembering my own passwords) and a lot of important notes in there.

..including this little blog’s password.

Great izni. Great.

But after all, my 6-years-old strong phone is still alive. Thanks baby for bearing with all the mess your owner made. You’re the best! ♡♡♡

Edit (1 August 2017) – Got back my Wunderlist data. Because it is an app based on account, so when I logged in, everything is there. Yasss