Spaghetti with black paper & garlic broth

So simple, and satisfying ♡♡

I love this kind of simple food. Such a minimalistic! It is just water, onion, garlic (I love garlic!), sprinkle of salts, a tablespoon of oyster sauce, cabbage and broccoli – and yes, spaghetti or angel hair of course. 

*Long weekend has come to the end. Will get back in work starting tomorrow, sure it would be a tough week since I just have 4 days to meet my monthly target. This coming May onwards, things will be a little bit different, in some aspects. I will have to brace myself, keep calm and just go with the flow. All will be fine.

Just follow the flow, just follow the flow…Promise.

Sunny Sunday

Sunny Sunday. I wanted to say how much today’s Sunday remind me of you.

Everything about you that I started to miss badly but who am I to claim so, plus it won’t make any difference anymore. Not this time I guess? You would never accept the flawed me again and I, obviously couldn’t take back my words even though I never meant so. The thought that we both hurt each other with words we didn’t supposed to say, stopped me from being so verbal that I used to be. Maybe it would be better left unfixed and just continue as it is. But what should I do in times like sunny Sunday like this that remind me of you? What should I do if I can’t help but missing you every day more and more?

Maybe that is it. Love is one thing, being together is another thing.

I always know that you are so okay even without me, but why it’s not easy for me? What it is about you that make me feel insane?

Crazy! You better shut up, mind.

Talk

Having team sharing session today. MJ asked us, 2 seniors (I’m the most baby among 2) to share on how do we cope with target, rejections, and challenges we face all these while.

It was when I realised how much I like to encourage and motivate people, as much as I love to motivate my inner self to stay strong and perform.

I just like doing such talk. It is fresh. 

Friday has come to the end. Finally, I can rest after the chaos week. I am just tired in and out. 

Friday Quote

“Every one of us is losing something precious to us. Lost opportunities, lost possibilities, feelings we can never get back. That’s part of what it means to be alive. But inside our heads – at least that’s where I imagine it – there’s a little room where we store those memories. A room like the stacks in this library. And to understand the workings of our own heart we have to keep on making new reference cards. We have to dust things off every once in awhile, let in fresh air, change the water in the flower vases. In other  words, you’ll live forever in your own private library.”

-Haruki Murakami, Kafka on The Shore

Welcome back!

This site is back on air. After some spring-cleaning, and a moment of hibernating I just hope the posts here would be more matured. 

You know, in life there are times where you hate yourself for being you, or feel like you’re such a waste of space, or being so damn insecure about things around you but guess what? Life goes on, with you or without you. It is perfectly fine to feel that way once in a while, but don’t forget to return and love yourself even more harder. If you don’t love yourself, who else will?

Till then! 

A sky full of stars

I don’t care if I’m the loneliest human on earth as long as I have this kind of sky – and this kind of stars staring at me – and this kind of passing meteor – and this kind of milky way – and..even without all the beautiful kinds, when you’re lonely and alone, you have to accept it no matter what. Deal with it and enjoy the buzzing darkness and loneliness that surround you like a weird, dangerous and hungry predator from the dark sea floor.

I don’t care, go on and tear me apart, loneliness.


Selfish?

I arrived home at PJ in the midst of pitch black sky, before the dawn. Saw an Indian aunty walked carrying a bag, well, it’s a usual sight. Everybody seemed to catch on LRT, bus or whatnot to start off their day. Parked my car, unloaded my things after a few good days of respite..and was deadly shocked when the aunty appeared behind me out of nowhere. She ambushed me with some morning preach sounded like..

“Hey, next time when you wanna park at this hour, be sure to off your car light. You might flash into people’s house and they might get awake from sleep, plus it is too early”

Startled, I just replied ‘Oh I see”.

First, I was DEADLY shocked to be greeted suddenly at that hour.

Second, how do I drive without the light? How do I park? What if I bumped into the big van parked beside my car park space? I am sure it will cost higher than that to awake people from their deep sleep because of my innocent car light. Oh come on.

My metatarsus is still paining me. Hope it won’t get any worse because I need my sound feet to walk to my working place every single day.

Thinking about the morning preach given by the aunty..am I selfish? Do I need to really turn off the car light for the sake of the neighbours’ beauty sleep?

Long post about petty things

8 hours of working today felt like forever. Not sure was it because of the usual Monday Blues or because I will be on a long holiday at the end of this week. Maybe both.

It was even tiring to be around people and keep professional. It drained me out to communicate with people whenever i don’t feel like to. 

Out of all days, KC ; The Manager called me today. Since there were a bunch of new comers came in few months back, she said, she doesn’t want me to feel left out. I didn’t, even a bit, to be frank. She asked my opinion about the company’s situation, our department, her leadership style, the new comers’ personality, and if I am satisfied with my current salary and commission. 

Worst, she asked me to shift my place since we are expecting a new comer in April. I mean, that is my place since one year plus ago and sure it holds its own sentimental value. Ah, I will miss the place dearly and getting accustomed to a new desk, a new corner..well, lets just try to get used to it. I couldn’t insist to be there even though I really want to do so. Made me realised that in life, we can’t get everything we want. That philosophy aside, its just a change of place, Izni. So, chill.

I asked her if it would be possible for me to relocate to another branch and she said, sure. I just need to tell her when I want to do so, so that she can arrange for that. I didn’t expect that kind of reply, and knowing how easy it is for me to change to another branch, somehow made me relieved.

Returned to my rent apartment, my roommate ambushed me with stories. How our another housemate hid the kettle in her room, how she was kind of offended when my roommate refused to accompany her to the dobby. And another group of the housemates made up a gang, eating in their room like we are going to interfere with their food. I don’t really mind about these matters to be honest since I’m just care about myself but hey, that is wayyyy too childish. Like, come on girls, act like a grown up girl. 

Time like this, where I don’t really like crowd and people..how nice if I own a house and stay alone with people I dearly love who can bear with my seasonal personality. Speaking of which, who likes me anyway. Who can stay put with my odd self? Maybe I should just get married to myself. 

Finally got myself batteries for my old bluetooth keyboard. Hence this long post. I will be back in writing field InsyaAllah. This time, maybe I’ll focus more on academic topic instead of nonsense, mushy short stories like I did before. Lol. I can’t even re-read my old short stories. It feels erghh to the core. But for the sake of memory, I will keep them save. 

Till then. Just hope tomorrow will be better.