By just believing..

I’ve been saving this draft for quite some times. Life has been quite good, or is it just me being over-confident that everything is good? Anyway, I believe everything is good – will be good ; that everything harsh will settle down, every bad things will slowly find its exit way. That aside, as the title denoted, I just feel like writing something about belief . About when you strongly believe that something is not that impossible, somehow they will turn out possible!

Now, believe in me. Do strongly believe in everything that you disbelieved. Thanks to this small book named “The Magic of Thinking Big”, I’m not that kind of person who usually invest my time reading motivation book! Tell you the truth, Izni is a kind of person who shitly say “whatever” after reading one-or-two-pages of a typical motivation book. But this book – it’s an exceptional. How to put it, urm its like when you hate eating ice cream (me not!) but when a special someone hands you an ice cream, the somehow different. Ok, what’s the point of the comparison?!

Anyway, here goes the true content.

This book, is a must-read book for everybody. The way David puts the word together – I’m on fire. I have no idea how by just believing that “you can do it” can be that powerful. Even if you think you have no capability of achieving certain things, when you started to plant a strong belief in yourself, everything will turn out smoothly. You’ll be surprised when you look back someday, that things you thought was impossible, is now achievable.

How it affects me? 2 weeks ago, in my working place, I basically gave up on my self. You know, work loads. I have that evil thought in my mind that “I can’t do it. It is impossible. I don’t know how to do this. I’m done.” But then, I remembered that I read this book. Why not implementing those rumors that by believing you can, you actually can. Ahaks. That cheesy quote, I said. Let’s try.

I tried.

Things get better, to my surprise. I don’t know how to describe it, but really, things starting to get better. I achieved that particular thing that I once thought impossible! No kidding, you better believe in your self now. Like really, please believe you’re capable of anything. Be confident. Do not let anything breaks you. You got a dream, you gotta protect it.  Copy that?

One of the thousand bombs that sticks onto my mind is that –

Think success, don’t think failure. At work, in your home, substitute success thinking for failure thinking. When you face a difficult situation, think, “I’ll win”, not “I’ll probably lose”.

When you compete with someone else, think, I’m equal to the best,” not “I’m outclassed.”.

When opportunity appears, really think “I can do it”, never “I can’t”.

Let the master thought “I will succeed” dominate your mind to create plans that produce success. Thinking failure does the exact opposite. Failure thinking conditions the mind to think other thoughts that produce failure.

It does sounds like an easy peasy command when one said Believe in yourself! – but when you really practice it, you will know.

Enough of that long rant. I will definitely write something about the book again, InsyaAllah. Next time, let consider uploading the book’s cover, I’m just too lazy to snap anything now.

Anyway, thanks for those who read! Drop me some comment or better yet a marriage proposal. I will consider it. Okbye.

“One day, you will get your dream job”

It was nearly midnight when I was re-tidying my resume. You know, I have been always seeking for a reliable answer for all those little questions that used to pop up in my mind. I’m seeking the best way to present myself in those freaking one-to-two pages; named resume or CV. Whether I should put up my photo (some said NEVER, some said MUST, so I was confused!) the best template and design, how and what to write etc. I’ve been thinking about one person who might answer that.

He is Ameirul Azraie. (Never heard bout him? No worries, Google will do) Go google now. 

One of the persons that I believe, he will has the answers that I needed. I was thinking, Ya Allah, it is good if I can meet him in person so that I can ask him whatever I want to know about job searching and resume.

And guess what?

Not more than 5 minutes, I saw a post on my Facebook timeline.

“Seminar of Job Hunting using Jobstreet and LinkedIn by Ameirul Azraie”. “Tomorrow”.“5 more peoples needed”. “Register now”.“Bangi” – oh great! I was at my sister’s house at Bangi.

I blinked my eyes as if it was a dream. After confirmed that it was real (haha!) I registered and pay for it online. For RM 3O only, I was happy like a small kid having an ice cream. Couldn’t be more grateful. Allah is indeed The Best Listener.

So, the next morning, I drove all the way to the stated venue and for the very first time, I met him face to face. God knows how, I met my Aquatic juniors too. They greeted and waved me “Kak Izni!” and I was like, “okay, great, who are them? Seemed familiar” haha and after using my skills of investigating, it was confirmed that they are my juniors. It was unexpected that among 10 participants included me, two of them are my juniors. I mean, what a small world.

Had a great time attending the 3 hours-course. He taught us the manners on how to make use of Jobstreet and LinkedIn to apply for a job position. My questions was answered, and returned home happy, rewarded myself with a bowl of ice cream.

From the seminar, I learned that it is not how competence you’re in a particular field or how much work experiences you got, but more importantly is – how your inaudible attitude speaks about you. The way you represent yourself, and how you ‘sell’ what you got in you, is what will make them impress.

For anybody who’s struggling to settle for a job, do not lose hope. You have to keep believing and try your very best. One day, you will be finally manage to get your dream job, build a good base for yourself and on top of everything, you’ll be fine.

For now, just don’t lose hope. Cheers.

Do the best with what you have.

It is really hard of not having my own vehicle here. Tough, very tough. Everywhere I wanna go, I have to attach with Sakinah and consider everything about her. Sometimes, I feel bad for it but I just have to ask for her help, because if I don’t, I wouldn’t be able of going anywhere.

I’m thinking about having my own car, applying for a loan, buying a cheap-second- hand car, but after all it all comes to money. If I have several thousands in my bank account right on this moment, I will wait no more. I’ll buy at least a functional car so that I won’t have to feel such guilty feeling like what I’m feeling right now.

Arrived a little bit late this morning, I just realised I have to make everything up to register for my Master study that lasts only this week. I have to move fast. Sitting on my seat in the Student room, I glanced the “Saiful Nang – Kisah Orang Menang” book that I left last week. Continuing where I last read, today it’s about being hardworking. He said, hardworking people will find a way to make a living. They didn’t waste their time doing shit and always be super positive in what’s happening around them. They stand up whenever they fall, plan everything accordingly and just do whatever they think they can. It’s all about do their best with what they have.

Taking the advice, I walked about 20 minutes from my residence college to my lab a couple times when Sakinah wasn’t around. That, my friend – was the toughest decision I’ve ever made. haha! Well, at least I can break some sweats along the way.

Anyway, the book is worth reading. I love to read it slowly, digest the writings and reflect upon it. Such an inspiring book! You should own one though.

Till then, me going lunch!


page 2 of 365

Back then in my childhood times, I was used to write my new year’s goals in my little diary. I grew up being ambitious, writing diary at the end of the day, and reflect upon a small thing. I still remember how alive I felt during those times. I am that ugly kid who doesn’t care about anybody else but herself, her goals and ambitions – her passions. And the kid is never disappeared. It is still inside me, the part of me that won’t vanished away.

So, well, it is a brand new year! Today’s morning read was fascinating. It is about “why we meant to meet or know someone”. Do you believe that there is no accident in life? Either the person you met and things happened to you, it wasn’t an accident at all. It was meant to be, for a purpose – – for a reason. Every single person that “fall” in front of you, is somehow has a role in your life, be it big or small, or with you realise or not. They hold several values in your life. Some will hurt, betray and make you cry and little that you know you’ll become stronger than ever. Some people came to your life, teaching you a lesson – for you to realise your mistakes and help you grow wiser. Some will just simply be there for you, inspire, befriend and love you unconditionally just to make you happy, feeling whole and complete again. Life,after all is a process. Turn it into a beautiful process :]

New year’s goals. Despite of having a list of goals for the whole year, I preferred a daily goal concept. It is more vibrant and refreshing! Everytime you wake up in  the morning, be clear of what is your mission for the day/ week /month.Seek for the motivations, kick out the negative vibes, and believe in your self.

It is JanYOUary. This is your month, your year. The best is yet to come!

happy beautiful friday 😀


The first 20 hours

“The greatest things in the world are brought about by other things which we count as nothing: little causes we overlook but which at length accumulate.”

So true, no?

Read it in “The First 20 Hours” book, one of the books that I found inspiring and refreshing. I know a book entitled “The Power of Now” (never read it) and I think the theory is the same. It is all about how enthusiastic we are in acquiring a new skill or just at least, to reach our daily life goal. How to be a very positive and productive people, the way we look ourselves, mind over matter thingy, and all – this book win!

After all, I think I should reschedule my daily days and re-set the surrounding vibes and goals. My enthusiasm is now renewed! The book really came on the right time.

Below is another motivating snippet. Happy reading!

“At every moment of every day I must decide what I am going to do the next moment;  and no one can make this decision for me, or take my place in this.”

Here’s a simple truth: the only time you can choose is today. Not tomorrow. Not next week. Not next month or next year. Today. When you wake up in the morning, you have a choice. You can choose to invest your time  acquiring skills that will make your life more successful, enjoyable, and rewarding…  or you can squander your time doing something else.


change (again?)

Realised that I’ve been in a long sleep before, I think it is the time to step out, breathe the new air, and keep walking as a new me. Forget the insulted things that ever happened, and turn into a new leaf. Create something, work so much hard, build yourself, and stay positive – life wouldn’t be so difficult after all.

Change, change, and change – countless time of changing, I know. Every day, or after some unfortunate things happened (like low quiz mark, difficulty in answering exam – haha) or when I saw someone who is far more religious and better than me, uncountable times I said to my self, let make some changes, and improvements. It is never too late.

Sometimes, it is bored saying the same thing. But most of the time, it is motivating. Enough for me to live as a better one for one more day.

Desires of changing and keep evolving in term of our soul – nothing wastes on it, right? As long as we doesn’t invited yet by Izrail , the chance for us to improve ourselves is widely open. What we need now is just try our best, set goals on what changes that we want to make, and work on it step by step. If one day, we feel so shattered and everything seems to be failed, then try again. Get up and try again. It is not going to be easy, I can tell. But it pays. It is going to be worth it.

I don’t know what ‘desire’ or what ‘flame’ in this song means, but I found it inspiring! Well, Pink’s song never fail to burn. 

Where there is desire
There is gonna be a flame
Where there is a flame
Someone’s bound to get burned
But just because it burns
Doesn’t mean you’re gonna die
You’ve gotta get up and try try try

[Try- Pink]

seek for your own "sunset"
seek for your own “sunset”


Yin and Yang

Yin and Yang is an important concept in Chinese community, and I don’t think that as Muslims, we can’t believe in that (Chinese isn’t a religion, it is a race). Just, we doesn’t tend to clarify that what we’re believing in is called “Yin and Yang”. It is only another term for “every things were made in pair” belief. At the end of today’s class, Lao shi told us about this concept and I, unconsciously had so much thoughts.

Yin and Yang, as the familiar figure that we often see; comprises of black and white. It is a symbol of perfection. Man – Woman; Earth – Atmosphere; Good – Bad; Love – Hate; and so on.

If we understand the nature of this world – everything were made in pairs; I think, life would not be as difficult as we expected. I believe, we came to know this law isn’t by Yin and Yang or from other legendary story or myth, it is in Al-Quran at the very first place, right?

Allah always mentioned in the Al-Quran about Heaven and Hell, Right and Left groups of peoples, Day and Night, Moon and Star and let us reflect on these amazing pair – hardship and ease.

It is beautiful that in every hardship, comes ease. No matter how tough your life is going to be, at the same time you will be experienced the ease.

Sometimes ( usually, most of the time), we often drown so much into the soreness that we overlook another bright side of something else. Ability to realize the existence of the easiness in that something else is a real cure; a cure for the wounded heart, and it provide us with another better path.

So, don’t worry for the difficulties that you have now, or things you can’t achieve for this time being. Allah already planned our road depending on how strong our feet can stand.

Again, for the perfection – with efforts come succeed, and with every cries has its own smiles. Everything is in perfect pair and each of them are completing each other.

We just need to spend some time to think and re-evaluate the rationality of our life events.

A reminder for myself, especially.

a knock-up

We are merely nothing if we are still in the prison, the old prison that restricts us from move on and get a better, quality life. To be a level upper from the place we are standing now, we have to do some improvements, and keep the consistency. Yes, sometimes we doesn’t understand how fast our life trail move and suddenly, we realize that we are just a step very close to death. Afraid that we doesn’t have good enough ‘presentation’ to The Most Gracious on that time, we must start from now.

There should be a point where we realize that “I should move on”, “I should prepare something”, “I can’t be like this anymore”, and those type of self-knock-up that lead us to a point.

I have some lists that I created long time before, and did consistent with that . But you know, as human’s imaan has its up and down – sometimes (most of the time!) I sink below the wave. The world wave that keep seducing weak peoples like me. Well, I add some more below my old lists just to tell myself that I have to really work hard to be a better one. I’m not forever young. I will die. I don’t want to be a regular person living in this world. I want to be someone different, internally.

Ok, below is the lists. I know nobody will read this (maybe?), but who knows if someone found this, he/she will have some idea of improving themselves? I really hope so.

  1. Deed-check list

A list that you have to face at the end of your day. It is a table, filled with day and date, consist of everything that you wish to do in a day. For example, earlier daily prayers, dhuha, tahajjud, talking good to others, selawat, fasting, al-Mulk before sleep, read a page or two of Al-Quran, find new hadith/ new knowledge, and so on. Paste it down somewhere you often see as a reminder and you just need to honestly tick down the deeds that you had successfully done, and reflect your day. It is motivating, trust me!

2.  Improve your tajweed

Brush up your old-tajweed knowledge by any mean that you comfort with. Here comes in the power of gadget and IT, make a full use of it and own a book to jot down your tajweed lessons. Improve them, you don’t want your kids laugh at you later?

3.  Read new book (whatever book)

4.   Find and memorise new recitation (e.g dua after dhuha prayer)

5.   Make a to-do list every day to maximize your time usage.

Consistency is the policy. Doing step by step our planned self-improvement is like adjusting ourselves to a better place. You can feel that you is closer to yourself. Ever feel that? I don’t know how to explain it literally, but it is a kind of teaching and communicate to your inner self.

You can add-on everything you want, and challenge yourself. There’s no such reason of not having adequate time. You will always have a time for something you really love and care of. Ok, that’s for me. Heh.

Till then. Let us improve ourselves for a better life in the future. Pray!


Cause He knows all
No compromise
Hears your laughs
Feels your cries
He is there all the time

(Trust in Allah by Saif Adam)

deadly in love with this song! :]


Every assignments had settle down, just a few left but it is not that heavy. So, I think, I can handle the remaining assessment well. Ok, not to over-confident, Izni! Hehe, hope will get through all that fluently, InsyaAllah.

Today, in Environmental Law’s class, Dr Azlan said something that most of our lecturers said before ; since the first semester in the first year, the lecturers keep saying things like that. I believe, most of my coursemate don’t ever feel like that, in fact we are quite scared with their expectations. They aimed too high for us, they expect a lot from us. But, we felt like..really? for what? We are the same like our previous seniors, know nothing from the first place, and frankly,we even don’t know there’s Science Aquatic course in this planet. Haha. Most of us asked for Medic in UNIMAS but we ended up stucked in this course. So, I know there’s at least a reason for that.

One of the obvious reasons is our friendship. We know each other and having a good relationship. We are destined to meet each other ; did you think it is for free? For no reason? There’s a lot of hidden reason for this destiny, and journey. They are awesome and I have to admit that they are one of my best classmates along my formal-educational-path.

Every lecturers put high expectations on us, my parents put higher. I don’t know if I can make into their line. Living with expectations, it is so close with frustrations and disappointments. But, as long as we try to do our best, everything should be fine. I always remember, in doing something ; do it for yourself, not for others. Let it meet your fullest satisfaction ; explore, dive and struggles in the storms or winds until the coast become clearer and clearer.

So, know what? In just 15 days, study week will show up. Final exam will be started very soon. I haven’t prepare anything yet and maybe this is the best time to start reviewing everything (even though I don’t know where to start, huhu ).

This semester is quite tough. Although it just 4 subjects but trust me, they are different from the previous semesters. They become more practical and subjective.

Finish of the tale. Keep motivated. It is okay if you were weak yesterday, but now, stand up and struggle for the best. Nothing will happen if you stand still, do nothing. Things you do now reflects your life in 5 and 10 years later.

Faber est suae quisque fortunae.


 eating durian again. Thanks syuha 🙂 Durian is one of the high-calories food :O



Like reaching out from a dark pitch tunnel, finally I can write again after a series of problem in loading this blog. Wonder what is actually happened.

Today is like a huge revelation. Revelation of uncertainty decision and whatever things that keep haunted me silently. I received a chronologies of motivational talks today and that was really made myself revitalize.

Started when I accompanied my friend to meet her mentor, Prof Shabdin. Apart of his hometown is Kedah, he is charming in his own style. I mean, not physically but in his words of wisdom. The way he talks and how he advices and motivates his students is enough to put him on top of the role model list. He truly is, indeed. At least, for me.

After their mentor-mentee session and after my long time silent in a chair at the corner, finally I took apart in the conversation. Then, it was when Prof Shabdin started to give his golden story and words. I can’t resist any story of him. They are worth to listen, like forever. How I wish to put them on a tape and re-listen it whenever I feel down.

He told us about his sweet and savoury life, especially when he was doing his master and phD. It makes me amused listening to his story and I left his room with a thought of “See? Allah already planned us a worth – riding journey”. All the problems, painful events that ever happened in our life is actually a seed. A fruitful seed that make us grow and be better. Whenever you is being scolded, isolated, hated, condemned, and thousands more things that made you pissed off, just keep in calm. I once looked down at the power of “Keep Calm” (clumsy me), until recently I tried to understand the meaning beyond the word.

It really is. Keep calm has power and know what? We can’t really solve our problem by keep thinking about it. It never been solved in that way. First thing first, you need to relocate your focus and try to “switch off” your brain. That’s all what we need. To relocate our focus, then it comes to the power of remembrance of Allah. That is the ultimate focus that we should give to.

Everything is a test and who give the test?

Switch off the brain is actually “sleep”. Prof said that one of his friend can’t even fall asleep at night due to his endless working mind. I am included into the zone, sometime.

That’s only a quarter part. Another part he gave is a family-oriented talk. I assumed it as his own experience sharing. “Topic” covered is like marriage during study and how to cope with personal problem, hardship in building our personality, parents and things like that. I found it interesting and yes, it is very important to organise them well. It can’t be planned just like ABC.

Following that, I called my mom right after Isya. Her voice always make me happy and motivated. Felt like I’m being here for a century. Counting days to meet all of them and I know I have to walk through a long journey before back in there. Mom said the same like what Prof Shabdin said. Exactly the same. She really wants to see me as a lecturer in the future. But, I am a bit sceptical in being involved in educational field. I know it is a noble job, but it is not the problem. The problem is I don’t know what is my problem in being so sceptical. Haha. Till here, my first Mid-term’s exam is tomorrow.

A lot more to revise and I don’t want to burn the midnight oil.