Love and Trust

I couldn’t count how many times I come to wonder about this – What is the real feeling of love? How to know if someone loves you? or whatever more mystical-undefined-wonder about love. For me, love is – well, a feeling – that you have toward someone that make you feel want to be together, or as nearest as possible.You have some unknown bonding that attract both of you together, just like a magnet. You want your loved ones are free from any other troubles, have a brightest and happiest day ever, and you demand their existence in every second of your life. Love is somehow a desperation, and often misplaced and mistreated.

Not until I heard someone I loved said – Love is not important, the most important is a relationship that filled in with trust. And the thought keep echoing in my frontal lobe space for these few days, some deep debates is happening there, and I can’t help myself but to vomit them out here. I don’t know what makes the person said that, or maybe I know – I’m not sure, but in a way, it is true.

In some ways, I think these two values should not put in a separate cohort for life at its best when they are co-exist. When you love someone, you will put on your highest trust ; when you trust someone, it’s simply means you love them. As simple as that, why don’t you simplify it as ” I Love You” or “love” itself? It is a phrase that contains a huge amount of trust, hopes, expectations, and whatnot.

To the person, I know you love, because you trust. Or maybe you don’t – It is up to you – I don’t mind, time will slowly reveal what’s the best.

Relieved that finally I can enjoy my morning by having the pomegranate juice and honey drink after uhm I don’t know when is the last time I had it. Hope that Perfect People by Peter James is a good start for me to re-charge my lame reading habit. I think, I wanna hunt for a part-time job later. Let see to what extend this body can bear.

Happy Friday everyone! and Pray for my uncle who is now battling for his life, InsyaAllah. I hope, his family can stand strong together.

Posted @ QUOTEZ.CO

What is the best event ever will happen to you?

Read something interesting before taking a nap just now. Something that worth thinking, and maybe simply enough to build another little, silent dream.

What is the best event ever will happen to you? What would be your biggest day? What will make you happy enough – that when it happens, you feels occupied, and in total satisfaction? What is the thing that you craved most along this life (other than your favourite food, heh)? What would it be?

Sort of life-defining question, which only take people who has clear life goals to be able answering it. It is beautiful when we know what we want, and which way we want to live. So that the actions and decisions followed are not going to be wasted, less grieving and confusion and every bit of it we will keep positive and cling to the principle of; come failure or success, we are actually a step closer towards the definition and goals of life we built earlier.

But process to find the solid objectives of life is as hard as living itself. Finding an answer of “what I actually want to be” and “what I really want” is sometime like a blank stare on the long empty road. We are confused which way we should take, or at which junction we should turn. Should we change the way we live now, or should we take ourselves down to another better road?

So, be confident. Be sure of what you want in your life. If it takes you to a long stare at the dark night, finding of the goals of living – then take it. It is now or never. Think about it and start living up to the goal marks. Face and get through all the challenges, because in the mind of people with visions, they see the dark tunnel as a sweet way toward a light end.

Me answering the “what is the best event ever will happen to you” question – for now, it’s maybe when I can create my own awesome and meaningful life outside. Yours could be anything. Anything that satisfied you personally, that you can appreciate yourself more.

I think this question can be in different stages. Like in certain stage of your life, you demand this and wish for something. At another stage, it keeps evolving.

Above all, the root why we are here is to worship Allah, to be an excellent khalif and khalifah. But the art in achieving the goal can be in many ways. It depends on our decision, and how keen we are in making our biggest day into reality.

As the saying goes, you’re never to old to dream a new dream.

cver

a gift

Today is magical. Totally miracle. I am almost burst into tears and felt like screaming out loud to the world. Before I went out settling my phone bill, I read a book review. A book that was written by a figure that I admired. Newly admired, to be exact. He wrote everything from his pure heart, all his experiences, dreams, journeys, joys and tears, motivations and every single word are meaningful – I seldom felt this kind of strong connection and emotion while reading a book. This book is special, maybe because part of his stories are just the same like mine.

So, I went out. After everything was settled, I wandered around the bookstore and tried to find the book from shelf to shelf even I knew that the possibility to find the book is very low because the bookstore is so small, and the book that I looking for is so on top of the bestseller-list. I don’t know why but I keep on searching. Almost four to five shelves I passed by, no, the book wasn’t there.

Okay, this is the last shelf, I told my self. If I still can’t see the book, I will walk out. I will get the book one find day, I will put the book on my want-to-read book list and look for it later.

And pap! My eyes stopped on the quarter-half of the rack and focused on one of the book spines. Exactly the same tittle, the same author, cover and colour and it just left one copy. Only one copy! Beautifully wrapped with clear plastic, as if it was really for me. It was so precious to let the book stay still on its place. I afraid if I would never find the book again. So, I grabbed it quickly, my heart raced like crazy and I’m in half-frozen state. Lucky me, and I felt so much special.

Usually, the books that I deadly want – are so hard to find on the rack. I know, miracle did exist and as long as you keep on searching, you will find it someday. Today is just my day, and it was magical. I have a strong fate with the book right? hehe, now I feel weird. Why I wrote my journey of buying a book this long and full of reflection?

The Day Before : Lisa Shroeder

” Next we head to the exhibit

I most want to see

                                  Passages of the Deep.

 

Sharks and stingrays swim

above us,

below us,

all around us.

We walk through

the tunnel of glass

slowly,

as if we’re afraid

of falling in.

 

“Can you feel it?”, Cade asks me.

“Feel what?”

“The Power.

The confidence.

They’re so damn confident.”

 

I nod.

I do feel it.

But I want to tell him, I feel something else too.

Electricity.

 

And it’s not from

the eels.”

(The Day Before by Lisa Schroeder)

***

Finished this book quite a long time ago, but recently I just love to re-read it again. Different from other book that were written with compact, small, and lengthy words, Lisa wrote this book with her style. Elegant short rhythm line which made me able to finish the entire book within only 2 days.

Tried to find the other books written by her at the bookstores since then but I didnt found any of them. For me, this book is not about the love story, I see it as a life journey in seeking her stand and identity.

” There is something comforting about a lighthouse

In the dark of the night,

hold on to the light,

and you’ll get back home safely

                     I need a personal lighthouse “

(The Day Before by Lisa Schroeder)

Lighthouse at Twilight

called abah just now. Talking about my craving on nasi daging and air asam. Heh,and know what? Pavi is weird. The price is getting higher. Sigh -_-

Foods here create their own boredom. I need something spicy and flavourful.

and cheap.

Morning coldness

Bismillah.

Woke up this morning and despite of coldness from the light rain outside, a weird feeling urges inside me. Something is empty and unfilled.

and I remembered about my ‘sleeping pen’ or ‘sleeping keyboard’ – It has been a long time since I didn’t write any stories,short or long stories. It is not my retarded imagination, maybe some passion lost with those wind.

Currently read a book by A. Samad Said and caught his precious line that really ‘talk’ to me.

” Rupa-rupanya membaca membenihkan kerinduannya sendiri. Dan tidak membaca terasa seperti gagal bercinta di zaman remaja”

Just in my current case, membaca is replaced by menulis.